It isn't Perfect

Well, I'm back. It's been a good while so I thought I would give an update on where I am today. Since, my hiatus from this blog, I have a new job that I like pretty well and I have enrolled in school. I have been in school for about a year and a half give or take. I am studying psychology and I'm hoping to put it to use helping children. I figure that if you can help the children when they are young, then they can grow up not being like me, or having other mental illnesses that make life harder than it needs to be. I hope that I can save at least one from having to go through all the mental anguish I and others have felt. Maybe that is naïve, but it's my wish all the same.

I am loving school, and I'm pretty good at it. I have been on the President's list, the Deans list, the honor roll, etc. I have always known that I wanted to go to college. Of course, I had planned to be a journalist, but I think this path better suits me and my goals in life to be able to help people. It's what we are here for. I firmly believe that. You may be thinking that I'm too messed up to help someone else. The way I view it is, that I have known first hand what its like to be in their shoes. I know how hard it is to change certain behaviors, so that you can have healthy relationships. I can be a support system that truly knows what they are going through, and that it does get better. I also genuinely want to help these kids. I'm not in it for anything else besides that. And because of that genuine desire, I plan to help the kids who may not have access to private counselors. I hope to work in a school setting or even the Department of Mental Health that helps people who have low income. We all have value. I tell people that all the time. We all have value. And just because someone is poor, that doesn't mean that they don't deserve the same quality of life as someone who has money. Life is precious. Children shouldn't have to worry about having someone who cares about them. They should just have it.

I am excited about this, I'm excited about this new journey in life. It's a journey that I never saw coming. I had pretty much given up getting the chance to better myself, to do something worthwhile. But then one day, I just decided to go for it. My love has been completely supportive of course. Of course he would be, he's been one of the biggest blessings in my life and I love him for everything that he is, and everything he isn't. I still have work to do on myself, I know this. I also know that I probably will always need work. I'm committed in doing that. We can't give up, and say that this is just who we are. That isn't doing us or anyone around us any favors. I used to say that I wanted to be normal. I don't wish that anymore. I just want to be happy, and to take care of people. I want to show love to those the world hates. Again, we all have value. Nothing in life is perfect, it doesn't need to be. It just needs to be filled with love, acceptance, and hope. It needs to be a life worthwhile. A life where we help each other, help pick up someone from the floor, to laugh with people, and to be the shoulder they need to cry upon. Life is about compassion. Get out there and live it. Do something that makes you feel good and help someone else put a smile upon their face. Shine your light wherever you go. It isn't perfect, but it just might be. Much love to all.